(Good)bye

Photography by Esther Bellepoque 

When some of us are saying goodbye to London after years, others are welcoming a new life, away from home - exciting and new. 

London is attractive, from far. First thought of freedom, right of rebellion and symbol of art, for years, and years. 

I lived in the city when the death of independence was knocking at the door.

I lived and experienced what I dreamed of in London, when the city was changing its visage. 

I was free to do and believe in everything, when back home, I wasn't allowed to. 

London doesn't do boxes, and doesn't have any boundaries. This is what I thought. 

The struggle of living is a pleasure, when you can taste the achievement. 

Soon to become a love and hate relationship, which you are not aware of directly.

The more you do, the faster you do it, the better it is. 

Faster, stronger, better. 

The taste of achievement is a bit of cocaine, once you have some, you feel the need of more and as for any drug, you are slowly, surely, destroying yourself. 

I came here when I was 19, I was a boy and became a man.

I thought this would be city of my life. London was the city where I discovered life. 

I went from one extreme to the other. 

I never stopped, I struggled and I loved. 

I have experienced, the best and the worst, ever experienced, but I made it happen for myself. 

I could barely write, I'm now published.

I could barely understand, I'm now thinking. 

I couldn't see the darkside, I've now tasted it. 

When art use to drive and draw a city of freedom of thought, expression and being.

Input of money, on every inch of the city, is slowly pushing and killing the charme of what we use to call London. 

Living is a luxury, the more you work, the "more you can afford" and the less you live. 

The sooner you die. 

I saw the creativity, coming from every part of the world, and still now.

Listen London, it's your chance to stop this, it's your choice to make it better. 

Our souls are still attracted to you London, our minds are still thinking of you London. 

You are the worst relationship I ever had, London. I gave to you ; heart and soul. 

I run until death into you, I still believed in you, when no hope was around. 

I saw young souls like mine, giving you. 

Listen London, you are receiving our efforts and beating us back. 

Listen to us, to them, before you lose your soul forever. 

I'm done with you. I decided to leave you and this time ; there is no coming back. 

You couldn't hear my voice and, read my words. 

I decided to live and not survive. 

I decided to see the sun and not the clouds. 

I decided to walk and not run. 

I'm suffocating London and, I can only see my own shadow. 

Where can I see my own reflection ? 

Written by Léo Lalanne-Berdouticq

Esther Bellepoque 

www.estherbellepoque.com